You raise me up

#nowplaying You Raise Me Up

By Westlife. It's a song from 2005. But it's still brilliant. :')

When I listen to it, I think of God. And His amazingness. Having time for everyone in the world, making miracles, and just...listening to us. I really don't know where I would be without Him. And today I had RE. We were reading the Bible and I saw this verse, "God does not let His children mix with sinners." Okay, I forgot the exact words but it was something like that. I remember I was doing the interview for DGS, I wasn't a Christian then but for some reason, I got in. I got into a school full of Christians. When I was still a sinner. So I guess even when I still wasn't a Christian, God was with me all this time. Helping me, guiding me. And eventually leading me to Himself. Wow...

The second person I think about is my helper who took care of me since I was 2. She left when I was 10. Why? Well, when I was I kid, she was a huge fan of Westlife. Ironic that I have come to like this, I don't know, singing group? And when I was a kid, she took care of everything for me. She played with me when I was bored. Fed me each night. I basically spent 95% of my life with her when I was 2-10 years old. Then she left for America to get married. I still keep in touch with her now but... not as often because I'm really busy. But I still love her. We were so close. She was more than a caretaker. More than a friend, perhaps. You know those moral values that we were taught at home? My dad wasn't around. My mom certainly didn't bother. She taught me. My helper basically taught me everything. She taught me the first dish I learnt. She taught me how to brush my teeth, to read and to eat. I own so much to her.

And I remember how I reacted when she left. I cried for a whole day and night. I slept in her room, not mines. For those two nights, I was just devastated. When I got back to school, I was dead. I couldn't think straight.

Then when I went to the SH Immersion in P5 which was almost just after she left. When I arrived at the airport, I had flashbacks at the gate, seeing her off. The last thing I remembered was her warm and soft hoodie. I remember when I was a kid, I used to snuggle with them, so soft and warm. So sometimes I hate my almost-photographic memory. I can still remember every detail of that day. But I'm not going to type it all here because tears are actually coming out now. On the last night of the immersion, everyone was excited to go back home. I was, at first, also as happy. Excited to share my adventures with her. But I remembered that she wasn't there. She was never going to greet me at the door again. Never going to wake me up with her always optimistic sing-song voice ever again... Tears threatened to fall but I was determined not to cry in front of my SIS friends.


Thank you, Sri. I promise one day that we will see each other again. May be it be on Earth or Heaven. God bless and protect you, Sri. May He give you your daily bread and not put you to the test but deliver you from evil.

I love you.